Why You Might be Feeling Resentful Towards Your Family and How to Find Happiness Again

Why You Might be Feeling Resentful Towards Your Family and How to Find Happiness Again
As a mom, you are constantly giving of yourself. You changed diapers, do the grocery shopping, cook meals, drive the carpool, help with homework, maybe conquer the mountain of laundry, but not fold it (let's not get crazy now!) and the list goes on. It's easy to feel like you are running on empty and that your needs always come last. The world tells us that women are meant to live in service to others, so as soon as your first baby is born you feel like you need to be everything for everyone and never say no or have me time. This is a recipe for leaving you burned out and resentful. If this sounds like you, it's time to have an honest look at your schedule, start asking for help and simplifying. 

Here's What Helps: 
1. Take an honest look at your schedule and determine how much time each task takes and then see if you are right: We often try to do too much and end up spread too thin. By taking a close look at how you spend your time, you can start to see where you can simplify and make some changes. 
2. Ask for help: It's okay to ask for help! Remember, it's supposed to take a village to raise a child and you my friend are not a village. (Even though I totally see that cape girl!) You don't have to do it all by yourself. Delegate some tasks to other members of your family or hire someone to help with things like cooking or cleaning. 
3. Simplify: You don't need to do everything perfectly or go overboard in order to be a good mom. Sometimes less is more. Choose what is really important to you and let go of the rest. (Pssst! When I say let go I mean, learn to say NO.) 

If you are feeling resentful towards your family, it's important to take a step back and examine your schedule and priorities. Make sure you are taking care of yourself by asking for help and simplifying where you can. By making some small changes, you can find happiness again as a mom.

If you need an easy button to get you started down the path from scary mommy to zen mommy I've got you! Take the free 5-day 10 minutes for me challenge over in my Facebook Community. Check it out here, start at day 1! 

How to Avoid Work from Home Mom Burnout - 5 Simple Ways to Find Peace Again

How to Avoid Work from Home Mom Burnout - 5 Simple Ways to Find Peace Again
You thought that working from home would provide the best of both worlds allowing you to be at home with your kids and make an income, but now you're questioning if you are cut out for this. 

You feel like you're rocking at one and failing at the other or that one roll sacrifices to make the other work. 

Whatever you're feeling, I'm going to assume that if you're reading this, you're feeling overwhelmed, burnt out, and tired. I know from personal experience that if you stay there too long, it will very likely leave you feeling broken. I'm also going to guess that you don't want to admit how you are feeling to others for fear of sounding ungrateful, guilty, resentful, cranky etc. 

Soooo instead of complaining, you suffer in silence and continue down this dark path until it makes you ill, drives you to drink or makes you feel like you need a one-month vacation just to sleep.

If this is you, keep reading because I am about to share a few things that were game changers that took me from a place of overwhelm to a place of fulfillment knowing that I would no longer have to look back over my life with regrets. Simply put, these things helped me feel whole again. 

Committing to at Least 10 Minutes of "Me" Time in Every Single Day

This may seem counter-intuitive if you are already feeling as if you already feel like there is not enough hours in the day but trust me, this is key! I would encourage you to start each and every day with at least 10 minutes of time just for you. 

What do you do for those 10 minutes? I would highly suggest that it does not include anything on your phone because we all know that the moment we pick up our phones we will see that someone (e-mails, notifications, texts etc.) needs us and it will stop you from finding peace. 

Here's what my 10 minutes started out like:

- Getting up 10 minutes earlier than normal (I didn't used to be a morning person, so I'm not going to pretend that this was easy, but I will say that it was well worth it.) 
- Drinking a full glass of room temp water 
- Sitting in complete silence for at least one minute pushing gently releasing any thoughts that would break that silence (If you have no idea how to actually  shut off your thoughts, I share about it HERE)
- Going for a quick walk around the block 

Listening to the Daily Audio Bible Ap

This ap is great because it's only about 20 minutes a day. I can listen while I'm driving and Brian (The guy that does the reading) shares such great inside and background on each book, and passages that may raise questions. 

If you listen every day for a year you will have listened to the entire bible and likely be able to understand it in a way you may not have before. This in and of itself will bring you more peace even if you miss a day or two here and there. 

In keeping with 10 minutes per day listen to each day for at least 5 minutes and pick up where you left off the next day or listen while driving like I do. There is a feature where you can check off the days in the app as you finish listening so that you can go at your own pace.

Gratefulness Journal 

If you just rolled your eyes, I totally felt that at first too, This became a part of my 10-minute me time as well. I simply found a cute blank journal and wrote 3 things that I am happy about and/or grateful for daily. 

What this did. was made me look for things to be grateful for for the rest of the day so that I would have something to write the next day no matter how small and it made me pause and appreciate small moments I otherwise would have missed. This is huge for work-from-home moms because it will allow you to focus on the good, like if you got one moment with your family that you otherwise wouldn't have, it makes it all much more worth it! 

Picking a "Peace Trigger"  

I can't remember where I heard about this, but it was brilliant! Here's how it works. You choose an action like walking through a doorway, drinking your water etc. or a common object like a pen or stapler or something you see at least a few times a day and decide that when you do that action or see that object, you will take a deep breath and think of the last good thing that happened in your life however small. 

I highly suggest implementing this especially if the gratefulness journal isn't for you right now. 

Finding a Form of Exercise You Love 

This is something I struggled with for over 7 years after my daughter was born. I would find something I loved and be consistent for a week. maybe two and then find every excuse as to why I couldn't until I finally decided to try out a circuit training gym called F45 and I fell in love! 

You don't have to join a gym if that's not your thing, but I will tell you that finding a form of movement that you actually want to show up for and miss when you don't is life-changing and brings a whole other level of confidence to your whole being. Not to mention you may feel better in your clothes as a bonus. 

In this case, the motivation has nothing to do with the number on the scale or your clothing size and everything to do with learning to say yes to you and show up for something that is just for you and the mental clarity and uplifting effect it has for the rest of the day! 

Actually Free Workout App (Not an affiliate link) 
There may not be an F45 gym near you or that may not be your thing, but there is a free app I like called FitOn that you can do from anywhere but promise me you will shut off notifications on your phone while you're working out so that you can focus. 

Whether you choose to implement one or all of these things, I would love to hear if they help you! If you feel like you need encouragement, I've built a community just for mamas like you over on Facebook where I offer free group coaching every week!  Check it out HERE. 

Sharing Prime Day Deals on My Favorite Amazon Purchases Over the Past Year!

Sharing Prime Day Deals on My Favorite Amazon Purchases Over the Past Year!
Hey friends! 

Did you know that today is Amazon Prime Day? It's like Christmas in July!! 

I don't know about you but I get excited about it and then spend WAY too much time searching for things on sale only to return half of it because it was an impulse buy or it wasn't actually what I was looking for. 

Soooo I thought it would be fun to go through and find all of my favorite items that I've purchased over the past year and see what is on sale today and send you links to them! (You know I love to help a sister out like that!) 

Full disclosure, I do get a small commission on any purchases you make via these links, but you don't pay a dime more and it helps pay for the kiddos to go to dance and taekwondo so they thank you a ton! 

The best air fryer out there! 
This thing is a LIFE SAVER!! It has a warm-up setting so you don't have to use the microwave and it makes things taste WAY better and it has cut my cooking time in half on tons of dishes!! 

Air Fryer Link: https://amzn.to/3AJfZvd  

Over the door spice rack to save a TON of room in the pantry! I've bought and returned many because they were too flimsy, too wide or just didn't look good. This one is perfect! 

Spice Rack Link: https://amzn.to/3nZx3FX 

Stovetop Coffee Maker
I literally use this every single day! I even take it with me when I travel. Kids have favorite stuffed animals that they have to take with them, I have my coffee maker because mama needs coffee ya'll! Also I'm not a fan of the K-cups because I've read WAY too much about what is in those things. No thank you! 

Stovetop Coffee Maker Link:  https://amzn.to/3NXy37X 

Cast Iron Skillet with Rubber Handle 
Another thing I use every single day and having the rubber handle is awesome so you don't burn yourself. These are SO easy to clean and you avoid toxins in nonstick pans. 

Cast Iron Skillet with Rubbler Handle Cover Link:  https://amzn.to/3c8aoEP 

Coffee Grinder 
Freshly ground coffee just tastes better. If you use the stove top coffee maker I mentioned you will want finely ground coffee, if you use a coffee press, you will want to use course ground. 

Coffee Grinder Link: https://amzn.to/3nYi8M2 

Sunrise Simulator Alarm Clock 
This is the only thing on this list that I don't actually own...yet. I've been hearing SO much about these things from friends that are also not morning people and since it's half off I'm about to try it out! 

Sunrise alarm clock Link:  ://amzn.to/3yzBmfZ 

Toy Organizer 
This has been great to help my kids actually find their toys and their books fit across the top. I put my son's in his closet and his room has stayed much cleaner! I can't say the same about his closet but at least I can just shut the door! 

Toy Organizer Link: https://amzn.to/3PkyYAC 

Pantry Storage Containers: 
Every time someone comes over and sees my pantry they comment on how organized it looks. This is my secret. I think I ordered two sets but they are on sale today so load up! 

Pantry Storage Container Link: https://amzn.to/3yxvow4 

Thermoses with Straws: 
These have been awesome for the kids! They last and they don't spill and there are lots of colors to choose from! 

Thermoses with Straws Link: https://amzn.to/3cc8hQp 

Backpack, Lunch Box, Pencil Case Combo: 
This is the set I got for my daughter last school year and it held up extremely well! Since they all matched it was easy for her to keep track of which ones were hers in the classroom! 

Backpack, Lunch Box Pencil Case Combo Link: https://amzn.to/3P5IlnW 

The Bug Bite Thing
Admittadly this looks odd, but for those of you prone to itchy bug bites, this thing is a must have! It actually works to make bites stop itching! 

The Bug Bite Thing Link: https://amzn.to/3avh3Iu 

Towel Hooks
Great for bathrooms with a lack of towel racks. I just stuck these over the glass on the shower and we have a place for everyone's towel. People ask me all the time where I got them. Right here! 

Towel Hook Link: https://amzn.to/3IuHxXk 

Stuffed Animal/Blanket Storage "Bean Bag" Chair
If your kiddos have a ton of exrra blankets and/or stuffed animals that they don't want to get rid of but you don't know what to do with you need this! You just suff them in it, zip it up and they ahve a comfy place to sit and read or chill! 

Stuffable "bean bag" Chair Link: https://amzn.to/3P3X0jo 
If you got one or more of these things reach out and let me know how much you love them! 

Have the best day!! Happy Shopping! 

3 Things You May Not Expect as a Stay at Home or Work From Home Mom & How to Handle Them w/ Grace

For some women, their ultimate dream is to be able to stay at home full or part-time with their children so that they don't miss out on those precious years when their children are little. In my experience, this was one of the single hardest decisions of my life because I had always planned to be a career woman but the second I realized the cost of daycare compared to my income and how little I would see my children do to my work schedule, that quickly changed. 

(Insert the old cliche here: If you want to see God laugh, tell him your plans.) 

Almost 8 years into staying at home/working from home I can now say I do not regret the decision to quit my 8 - 5...however, in many ways...it is not AT ALL what I thought it would be. So for those of you who have a picture in your head of what staying at home will look like, or those of you struggling with the realization that it's different from what you expected, let me share a few things that may have come as a shock to you OR that you may be struggling with, and don't want to say out loud, so that you know you are not alone. 

Here goes... 

1. Your house will NOT always be clean. 

What you thought: 
You will have all the time in the world to keep your house clean, get the laundry done and stay organized. 

New Perspective: 
You are at home more, but so are your children and children are messy period. The whole reason you chose to stay home with your kids was so you could spend time with them right? Keep in mind that you will not remember how clean your house was, but you will remember experiencing milestones and memories made so focus on making memories and put a limit on the cleaning time or keep a scaled back cleaning service in the budget. 

What helped me: 
When you clean, find ways for the kids to help. They won't do it perfectly, but they will learn life skills. Assign days of the week to clean certain areas or do a task for a short time. (Ex. do one load of laundry every morning, vaccume on tuesdays, mop on Wednesdays, clean bathrooms on thursdays etc.) 

2. You May Still Need an Occasional Babysitter

What you thought: 
I thought I could completely cut babysitting costs from the budget aside from the occasional date night with the hubby. 

New Perspective: 
You're probably used to fitting things like doctor, hair, nail appointments and happy hours with the girls in during daycare, work hours or evenings. When you stay at home you will most likely want to do these things during the day during the times when you have the kids. It can be tricky to find a reliable daytime babysitter so you may want to still allot some money in the budget for babysitting.  

What helped me: 
Finding mom friends with similar aged kids near by that don't mind swapping kids when appointments come up. Bonus for finding lunch spots to let the kids play while you chat! Swapping happy hour for play dates is now a thing! 

3. Your Friend Circle Will Likely Change

What You Thought: 
You may wish to keep in touch with your current friend circle, but keep in mind that may or may not be phesable. Your schedule will likely change quite drastically and your interests and topics of conversation will most certainly change. Be prepared that this may mean it's time to find a new tribe that is more in alignment with your lifestyle. 

New Perspective:
Factors I hadn't considered which have greatly affected my friend circle:  
- Ages of your children and whether or not they share interests with and/or get along with your fiend's kids 
- Shedules; your kids may be early risers so you like to get out of the house early others may like to sleep in. 
- Preferred activities: You may like to do outdoorsy things while others prefer the AC/Heat. You may be a home body while others like to get out and about. 
- Beliefes and values: Parenting styles and values vary greatly and you may find that while you can be friends with someone, you may differ in opinions on what is acceptable for your children. 

What helped me: 
I quickly found that trying to meet fellow mamas at the local playgrounds didn't work out well for various reasons but when I connected with other moms that my children were friends with at church, mom's day out programs and extra curricular activities, it seemed to be a better fit because we had something in common and the kids generally gravitate toward those with similar interests and common ground. 

If you're new to staying at home, remember to give yourself grace and do your best to carve out quiet time just for you regularly! You CAN NOT pour from an empty cup and your kiddos need a happy mommy NOT a super mom that does it all.

Struggling to find quiet time? 
Oh my friend, I've been there and I've got you covered! There is a free 5 day 10 minutes for me challenge (<- Click the link) over in the facebook community which will help you carve out "me" time every single day. I've gotten great feedback from those that have made the commitment and taken the challenge! 

I can't wait to see what it does for you!  

How 10 Minutes of “Me” Time Can Change Your Life

How 10 Minutes of “Me” Time Can Change Your Life
I checked all of the boxes…

Go to college, get good grades while learning to live on coffee and Ramen, fielding late night calls from professors asking where I was because my project was not complete and on my desk at 11 pm almost a full day before it was due and reminding me that sleep was a luxury. Graduate with honors. 


Get married to the true love of my life, my college sweetheart who I met by the grace of God 6 years before I finally felt I had accomplished enough to say I do. Thank you Jesus that you gave him patience. Lol…but seriously! 


Get a good job that would require me to prove my worth in a field dominated by very conservative men. 


Buy a house in a nice neighborhood and a car that didn’t require weekly repairs and “fit in” to said neighborhood. 


Have babies and decide that it was best for our family that I leave my job to stay at home with them because my heart broke when I toured each and every childcare option and the cost was not justifiable when compared to my salary and expenses. 


I thought at this point that I would slow down and truly treasure this time with the tiny person we had made, and I did, until my first baby started walking and we learned we were pregnant with our second and I was already starting my third business from home. Mom boss culture was my MO and I was officially addicted to “busy”. 

Seemingly in the blink of an eye my kiddos were 6 and 4 and as much as I loved the life we had built, I was constantly overstimulated, overstressed and I would seethe with jealousy any time I saw another mom post about a girl’s weekend somewhere. 

Then, I saw THE post. I’m not even sure who posted it, or exactly what it was about but I do remember that it was about the importance of “me” time which seemed to be a hot topic lately. I normally flippantly laughed these off and kept scrolling, but this time one of the comments caught my eye. A fellow mama said “My “me” time is on the toilet with the door open in the 30 seconds it takes my toddler to realize that I’ve “left her forever”. 

My first thought, oh my goodness! This girl gets it and I’m not alone!! My second, is this what motherhood is meant to be? What are we teaching our children if we are constantly modeling stress, overwhelm and unhealthy sacrifice showing up as skeleton versions of ourselves in order to meet their needs? If we are constantly telling them that Mama needs a break from them, what does that do to their self-worth? 

That’s when I knew that something needed to change and it had to be in a way that was realistic and sustainable for me, so I made a commitment to myself that I would find 10 minutes every day for “me” time. What would I do with that 10 minutes? At first, I just sat quietly, took a walk, journaled, read, or prayed. Whatever my heart told me that I wanted….not need….to do just for me at that time. The to-do list could wait.

I also told myself I was also not going to allow any negative thoughts to stick around in that 10 minutes so if any came in, I would picture a warm blanket being wrapped around it and gently push it away in favor of something positive. I allowed myself to dream, picture the ideal version of myself doing exactly what she was put here to do. 

Was it hard at first? Absolutely! After about a week or two, I learned to look forward to that 10 minutes and started looking for ways to extend my time to allow me to actually step into the much better, healthier, and healed version of me that I had pictured. I started setting goals and identifying habits that I needed to change or implement in order to get me there. I felt less guilty about asking for help and the best part, I started enjoying my time with my family SO much more! I started to actually like me again!! 

If you resonate with any of this please know I see you and also know that all of these things are possible for you as well. I’ve created a group over on Facebook of women just like you that are committing to 10 minutes of “me” and seeing where it takes them. If you would like to join us and take the challenge here’s your link! (Click Here) I can’t wait to see what it does for you! 

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